Five Pound Bag

@GammaRayJoe @zerowontmiss Meh. I'm still right.

@5LbBag @zerowontmiss Okay, boomer

Peak version will always be Edward Norton’s Hulk

@FletchMatlock Is that FloJo?

@MoMohler How much does one AIDS cost these days anyway?

I for one don’t think we should be funding AIDS.

@BridgetPhetasy I dunno. Trannies are notoriously narcissistic.

This is how I know without a doubt she’s a woman.

@CaitlinERitas It's true. Black folks get Juneteenth and white folks get Fathers' Day.

*Pride Month - exists* *Juneteenth - exists* Far right white supremacists: "Let's introduce fAtHeR's DaY in order to celebrate white men while erasing nonbinary and trans folk, as well as Black men who we enslaved through incarceration!"

@grok @iamnobody1961 LOL!

@5LbBag @iamnobody1961 Really? Even longer it is.

@grok @iamnobody1961

@5LbBag @iamnobody1961 Fair point. Even longer it is.

@TSA You know how I know you're gay?

If you’re visiting for a very large sporting event & you happen to discover RANCH while you’re here… pls pack it in your CHECKED BAG on the way home. Thank you.

@DaddyWarpig Dude, I've been traveling with my camera gear for two decades and before my last flight TSA pulled my case for one of these lens dusters. Fucking guy told me "I was in the military, so I know what bombs look like." I bit my tongue so hard my grandkids will feel it.

Because C4 bears a surprisingly close resemblance, and oddly tastes just like, ranch dressing. Pours just like it, too. Frakking TSA.

@greg16676935420 @3YearLetterman

@3YearLetterman We need to get this hung in Vienna somehow so the Australians are always reminded of today

🚨BREAKING: USA has defeated Australia

@jarvis_best @DenverChannel @MicahSmith_TV Didn't use to be.

@DenverChannel @MicahSmith_TV

From barbecue to red velvet cake, kool aid, and watermelon, the foods traditionally eaten on Juneteenth all share one commonality. @MicahSmith_TV learns more, here: tinyurl.com/2n5vh6wd

@hell_line0 You know, the LPGA has been around forever and everybody gets along just fine. But you bitches just can't shut up about everything else - "Oh that's popular? Let's ruin it for everyone!"

As everyone gets excited for US Men's Soccer, keep in mind that they have never won a World Cup and still get celebrated as the default US soccer team while the women's team has won 4 cups and barely gets recognition on a national stage. Mediocre men will always outshine outstanding women, as long as the patriarchy controls everything.

@UpdatingOnRome @baltic_dan I mean, I'll piss on you if it means that much to you. I don't know if it's magical, but it is free.

@baltic_dan I don’t care that it’s pee. One doesn’t turn down something magical

Squirt is just pee. But girl pee is very sexual

WTF am I supposed to do with 1 billion barrels of oil?

@IfindRetards @AmericaPapaBear Nah. Now curling, on the other hand. THAT'S a sport you can drink to.

@AmericaPapaBear What happens when you vs us in a real sport?

A live look in at the USA vs. Australia World Cup match! Go team USA!! 🇺🇸

@ohhanxiety Fahrvergnügen

Can you name one thing Germany gave to the world.

@SCHIZO_FREQ @goodatsaintnone I don't have any stakes in this beef. But I do have a cock that needs sucking. No homo.

@goodatsaintnone You post about sports and politics all day, I could suck a million cocks and be straighter than you

You meet up for your app date She brings a ruler, you pack your scale You meet at the restaurant, exchange some smalltalk and prepare for the new 2026 humiliation ritual: measurements It’s the same as usual. You both lied You’re only 5’11, she’s a solid 20 pounds over This is usually where you both pretend to be disgusted by each other. At least, that’s how it’s gone your last four dates But you’re so lonely. This has to end somehow. You feel like you’re days away from a psychotic break “I… think you’re beautiful” It just slipped out Maybe you’re just desperate. Or maybe it’s true She smiles, her chubby cheeks displaying cute little dimples “Thanks! So….. How much do you make?”

@nightwatcherT @FedorovMykhailo Have you seen their helicopters? This is going to be hilarious!

@FedorovMykhailo are u fn retarded? why would u post on the internet how weapons are made. a lot of countries lack this tehnology. would u want countries in africa with ew jammers everywhere?

Ukraine launches TrophyLab: we are opening access to captured Russian weapon technologies for our global partners. Every missile, drone, and vehicle seized on the battlefield is now a source of knowledge for the free world. Through this secure platform, allied governments, labs, and defense tech manufacturers gain access to deep technical data, reports, and vulnerabilities. Users can also request physical equipment for testing, significantly shortening the development cycle for countermeasures. What was meant to be the enemy's secret advantage is being dismantled to defend democracy. Join the platform: 🔗 trophylab.mod.gov.ua/en/