PolyD_ 🥪 | 10 years in the desert

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PolyD_ 🥪 | 10 years in the desert

PolyD_ 🥪 | 10 years in the desert

@Polyd_

CTV. Creator of Enigma. Vires in Numeris. Remnant. GameMaster. Archiver. Namer. The 10th Man. #npub1775tuvua6h9mkmlqm3ragxpv3z3eegahhshydj36u2xq72vve9lsq29jcw

Oasis Katılım Eylül 2021
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PolyD_ 🥪 | 10 years in the desert
Read about the future beyond Lightning with Enigma. I've updated the article with feedback from the community. The Enigma Network and how this impacts Lightning and makes us less reliant on it. A blurb about Sapio, a frontend for Core to make things fun app.sigle.io/polydeuces.id.…
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WhatmattersinGeorgia
WhatmattersinGeorgia@WhatmattersinG·
🚨 GEORGIA 🚨 👉 PAY ATTENTION TO FOLIC ACID LEGISLATION IN GEORGIA SB 278 — the “Corn Masa Nutrition Enhancement Act” — would have required corn masa products sold in Georgia to be fortified with synthetic folic acid beginning July 1, 2027. The bill ultimately died after crossover and committee movement, and a related folic acid provision was stripped from HB 1138 on sine die. Why does this matter? Because a randomized controlled trial published in the Journal of the National Cancer Institute found folic acid supplementation MORE THAN DOUBLED prostate cancer risk. Figueiredo et al., 2009: Hazard ratio 2.63 95% CI 1.23–5.65 P = .01 PubMed: pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19276452/ The study also suggested natural folate from food may behave differently than synthetic folic acid added to processed products. Mandatory “fortification” of food with a synthetic compound tied to serious health concerns raises major ethical and informed consent questions. Georgians should watch these bills closely. @GASenateGOP @GASenateDems @GaHouseGOP @GAHouseDems @GaHouseHub @RepBenWatson @Kaykirkpatrick7 @blhdds @RepSharonCooper @rep_karen @GaDPH @GADCH @healthyinformed @standforhealth1 @GAVaccineChoice @FultonGASpeaks
Dr Tim Kelly@DrTimothyKelly

Folic Acid has been shown by RCT to more than double the risk of prostate cancer. The mandatory "fortification" (new speak for contamination) of our food with a synthetic drug that causes serious harm is an unethical violation of informed consent. It must be stopped.

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🚫👁️Drinks on Saturday🇺🇸
If you thought the variegated random patterns on shows like Forged in Fire were wild, you ain't seen nothing yet. Bladesmith Lew Griffin just dropped pure genius: a custom snowflake Damascus chef's gyuto using 1095, 15N20, and nickel-powdered steel. He 3D-printed a detailed snowflake in PLA filament, strategically embedded it in the billet, then forged, twisted, and welded layers around it. The plastic burns cleanly away during the process, leaving a crisp, symmetrical void that reveals a stunning crystalline snowflake motif in the etched blade—perfect symmetry, razor precision, and artistic depth no random fold can match. An incredible amount of skill, planning, and math went into this. From billet prep and precise placement to heat treat and that gorgeous handle, it's a one-of-a-kind masterpiece. Most likely there will never be another exactly like it. Modern bladesmithing at its absolute peak. ❄️
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LaurieWired
LaurieWired@lauriewired·
A cool way to watermark network packets is to (very subtly) adjust the timing. Packet comes in a tiny bit late, maybe that’s a 0. Packet arrives on time? Maybe that’s a 1. Of course, the neat part is that everything can remain entirely encrypted / the side channel doesn’t “touch” the underlying data flow, so it looks relatively normal. You can actually get this timing to survive through multiple network hops + switches, because statistically they are (mostly) adding fixed delays. Queueing can mess you up, but as long as your information is above the network jitter noise, you can still decode it. There’s basically an arm’s race going on. Some networks attempt mixing flows with traffic shapers to preserve anonymity…but you also can’t infinitely pad/delay packets without users getting really annoyed. So, so many ways to hide a bit when you think about it. …also a lot of ways to detect it too.
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AyakaMods
AyakaMods@AyakaMods·
Google just permanently banned a manga artist’s entire Google account, just for uploading his own old manga files to Drive. AI moderation triggered and flagged it, he tried to submit appeal then he got rejected it by Google and now he has lost everything like Gmail, Drive, all linked services is gone. He never even sharing the files publicly, it’s only backing up his own a private work like any creator and artists. This is Google Drive “AI moderation” in action. No human support and no serious to take action. Physical storage or real private alternatives only. Support the artists getting screwed by this. This level of corporate overreach is insane.
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糸杉柾宏@『寝取り魔法使いの冒険』第1第3 月曜更新@masahiroitosugi

ところで恥を忍んで告白するのですが、私、Googleから垢BANされました。昔描いた漫画のデータをドライブにアップしている時に警告が出て、再審査請求も却下され、見事垢BAN。 まじで、困るよ。いろんなサイトやサービスにGoogleアカウントを使っていたので。 良い子のみんなには関係ないかもしれないけど、「俺、良い子…かな?」って人は気をつけてくれよな!

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RAW EGG NATIONALIST
RAW EGG NATIONALIST@Babygravy9·
One of the most valuable contributions of esoteric health Twitter would be to produce a C-section protocol for babies and infants to enhance immunity and counter the negative effects of the procedure. Does such a protocol already exist?
ai waifu@waif0000

Babe wake up, the 22-year C-section follow up data just dropped, and it’s *much* worse than the public was led to believe. 1 in 3 American babies are born this way.

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Clark & Company🌎
Clark & Company🌎@clarkandcom·
鉄器時代の人々が家畜と同居していたのはその体温だけでなく、堆肥の発酵熱が重要だったため。 清潔を優先する貴族が朝晩の寒さに耐え忍ぶ中、農民はその匂いにさえ慣れれば、一頭の牛だけでファンヒーターの強を24時間付けっぱなしにしているほどの暖房効果が得られたそう。
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Nancy Pearcey
Nancy Pearcey@NancyRPearcey·
Dick Teresi: Why doctors do not even pretend to follow the rule of brain death "The concept of personhood was first explicitly proposed in 1968 by a group of thirteen medical doctors and professors who met at Harvard Medical School. They offered what came to be called “the Harvard criteria” for establishingwhen a patient has died. In the process, says science journalist Dick Teresi, “the Harvard criteria switched the debate from biology to philosophy. You are dead not when your heart cannot be restarted, you can no longer breathe, or your cells die, but when you suffer a ‘loss of personhood.’” The problem is that the concept of personhood is not based on any objective reality. Most people think brain death is established by an EEG. Not so. Back in 1971, it was discovered that some patients diagnosed as brain dead still had brain waves, so the requirement of an EEG was eliminated. The measures that doctors now use to determine death vary widely. Some doctors like Ronald Cranford have argued that even patients who are conscious—who can answer questions and scoot around the hospital in an electric wheelchair—are not “persons” and should have their food and water discontinued. Teresi concludes that death has become “a social construct. We write people off as dead when it is convenient to do so. . . . Doctors are not making medical judgments but rather moral judgments about who deserves to live or die.” Essentially a patient is no longer a person when the attending physician says so." (from Love Thy Body)
Dr. Heidi Klessig@heidiklessigmd

In his book “The Undead,” science writer Dick Teresi exposed the fact that brain death is not death. Here’s how he answered an interviewer’s question about whether better protocols would fix this: “Not really. It’s true that as much as 65 percent of brain death exams are done incorrectly, and many doctors could not list the criteria for brain death correctly. Doctors I talked to said not to worry about patients moving about on the table or their blood pressure or heart rate spiking during harvest. These were just post-death reflexes, not an indication of pain or awareness. And yet the Harvard Criteria, the ur-text of brain death published in 1968, specifically state that there should be no reflexes and no movement. But the bigger problem is that brain death as death per se is a fiction. There is no scientific purpose for brain death. It’s a serious, serious kind of coma, but not death. It was made death for practical reasons. The heart of a brain-dead person still beats, and circulates blood to the organs, keeping them fresh for their future owners. And though the 1981 UDDA (Uniform Determination of Death Act) states that the “whole brain” must be dead, the whole brain is rarely tested. Usually, only activity in the brain stem is tested, not the cortex or higher structures of the brain, where consciousness, pain, and pleasure are interpreted.” When asked whether this was a conspiracy between the transplant community and those who determine when a patient is dead, Teresi answered: “Conspiracy is such a harsh word. Let’s say there’s a happy confluence of coincidences that results in $27 billion of revenue per year (in 2012) for the transplant business and incomes unheard of in other medical specialties.”

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Roman Helmet Guy
Roman Helmet Guy@romanhelmetguy·
Emily Wilson completely changed the meaning of a key word in the Odyssey to make it seem like Helen of Troy didn't blame herself for starting the Trojan War, when in fact the text makes it clear that she did. In 4.145-146, Helen calls herself κυνώπιδος (dog-faced). This is an insult meaning "shameless." It is commonly used to refer to unfaithful lovers. For example, it is used elsewhere in the Odyssey (8.319) to refer to Aphrodite after she cheats on Hephaestus with Ares. Fagles translates 4.145-146 to: "all you Achaeans fought at Troy, launching your headlong battles just for my sake, shameless whore that I was.” Lattimore translates 4.145-146 to: "for the sake of shameless me, the Achaians went beneath Troy, their hearts intent upon reckless warfare." Wilson completely changes the meaning of κυνώπιδος to "hounded" (she is trying to be cute by translating 'dog-faced' to a word that still relates to dogs, even though its actual meaning is completely unrelated). She then applies this word to the Achaeans, saying that they were hounded, not Helen. Her translation is in the image below. This is obviously an ideological change that she made because she personally believes Helen shouldn't be blamed for the Trojan War. She deliberated distorted the meaning of one of the foundational texts of Western literature to conform with her modern beliefs.
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Bluebell Raven
Bluebell Raven@BluebellRaven·
The word “Dumbledore” is an old regional English word meaning “bumblebee.” Its origins trace back to Old English dialect traditions, where the sound and structure of the word reflected the buzzing nature of the insect. The term gradually disappeared from everyday language but gained worldwide recognition through J.K. Rowling’s use of it for Albus Dumbledore in the Harry Potter series. 🎨D.D. McInnes. #WorldBeeDay
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Will Rinehart
Will Rinehart@WillRinehart·
This was by far the most emotionally taxing part of settling my parent’s estate. My parents died months apart, both at the age of 71, two years ago, and what made it difficult was coming to terms with all of the life planned to live. What really got me were the empty baby books my Mom got for the grandbabies yet to be. I have a feeling a lot of Millennials, when they are faced with this decision, are just going to junk it all. While I understand that path, I just couldn't do it. I went through every last item as a last act of service to my parents who gave me so much. I went through every piece of paper, every picture, every drawer, organizing the stuff that is important while throwing away all the junk. I filled two 30-yard roll offs with trash, gave away furniture and kitchenware to my young cousins starting their own life, and still have a full storage unit of stuff. My parents always talked about cleaning out the house, and for a while, I was frustrated that I did what they never could. But dealing with it all resulted in a form of self-revelation. I found my Mom's poetry, clippings from my grandfather's political campaigns, and long lost letters from my great grandmother. I found my uncle's hand carved box that I had never seen before, and the knives they took away from me as a kid. I found my old boombox that would lull me to sleep that I now use in our second bedroom for audio. At the time, I saw the task as one of stewardship. Now it I understand it as something much more. I was coming to terms with two lives that have passed, one psychically loaded item at a time. I sorted every item with care rather than avoidance, recovered aspects of myself I thought were lost or didn't even know, and have emerged with a richer, more continuous sense of my place in the world. I am forever indebted to my wife @CharDreizen for giving me the space and the time to deal with all of it. I know others don't have such understanding spouses or partners. But when I underline passages in a book using a Paper Mate #2 that I know was my Dad's or look up from my desk to see my Mom's conch shell collection mixed with my own sperm whale trinkets, I feel this deep connection with them. But that connection is not imbued with nostalgia for childhood. It reminds me that my childhood has long since passed, that my home is the one I've built with my wife, and that I am the keeper of what they left behind. They are not behind me. They are with me, moving forward.
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Laura Lupin@bugsandfishes

When your parents die you will, if you're lucky, be an adult with a home full of your own possessions and all of a sudden you have to fairly swiftly deal with your parents home and all of their possessions and you absolutely cannot cram all of the latter into the former.

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MoundLore
MoundLore@MoundLore·
You can walk into almost any classroom and hear detailed timelines about Rome, Greece, or medieval Europe. But ask how many people can name the major ancient centers of North America…. Cahokia, Poverty Point, Newark, Spiro and most can’t name even one. This continent built massive ceremonial landscapes, ran long-distance trade across thousands of miles, and supported cities larger than many European capitals of the same eras. The history was never missing. It just wasn’t emphasized.
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MoundLore
MoundLore@MoundLore·
A lot of Americans remember Sears as a dying store in a half-empty mall. That’s not what Sears was. Sears was how American factories entered ordinary houses. Kenmore in the kitchen. Craftsman in the garage. DieHard under the hood. Coldspot humming in the corner. Lawn tractors in sheds. Socket sets in drawers that nobody was allowed to lose. It was basements, workbenches, catalogs, part numbers, repairmen, delivery trucks, credit accounts, and old men who could hear a washer struggling before it finally quit. A kid could flip through the Wish Book and learn what adulthood looked like. Tools. Appliances. Work boots. School clothes. A bicycle. Sometimes even a whole house ordered by mail and built piece by piece after the materials came in by rail. That was the part Sears understood. America was full of people trying to build stable lives with practical things. Then the practical world got replaced by a disposable one. The catalogs vanished. The stores hollowed out. Manufacturing moved overseas. Repair got expensive. Replacement got cheap. The people who knew how everything worked got older, retired, or died, and a lot of what they knew went with them. People call it the death of a department store. I don’t. Sears was one of the last national systems that still assumed ordinary Americans should know how to maintain the world around them instead of just replacing it. That’s the strange poverty nobody talks about now. Not having fewer things. Having more than ever and understanding almost none of them.
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Master Metabolism
Master Metabolism@lowmegatron·
“Because of my own experience in finding that eating a raw carrot daily prevented my migraines, I began to suspect that the carrot fiber was having both a bowel-protective and an antiestrogen effect. Several women who suffered from premenstrual symptoms, including migraine, had their serum estrogen measured before and after the "carrot diet," and they found that the carrot lowered their estrogen within a few days, as it relieved their symptoms.” — Ray Peat: Natural Estrogens Yes, fibers can absorb estrogen in the gut, and increase transit times, thereby lowering serum estradiol levels. “Wheat bran, senna and plastic flakes led to the intended reduction in whole-gut transit-time, increase in defecatory frequency and increase in stool form score. Loperamide caused the opposite effect. The length of time the absorbed oestrogen was detectable in the serum fell with wheat bran and senna, although this was only significant for oestradiol... Our data indicate there is likely to be an effect of intestinal transit on the absorption of oestrogens but more refined techniques are needed to characterize this properly.” — Intestinal absorption of oestrogen: the effect of altering transit-time
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Master Metabolism@lowmegatron

How could carrots affect estrogen, progesterone, cortisol, fertility, cancer, and gut bacteria? ✪ “A woman at a clinic for fertility accidentally found out that giving the infertile women an antibiotic, a lot of them said their headaches were cured by taking the antibiotic. And they looked at their blood hormones and saw that where they had had previously high cortisol and estrogen and low progesterone in their blood, the antibiotic had reversed that pattern, increased their progesterone, and lowered both their estrogen and cortisol. And they figured out that the antibiotic had stopped a bacterial process that was blocking the liver's detoxifying action. When your thyroid is low, the liver excretes estrogen into the gut, trying to get rid of it. But a low thyroid person has sluggish digestion, and that excreted estrogen is reabsorbed from the gut back into the liver and creates stress hormones and accumulated high estrogen, blocking progesterone production. And so the antibiotic was improving their intestinal health and, therefore, their hormonal health. And I tested the idea of just eating a big carrot every day and had women with this pattern of high stress hormones, estrogen, and low progesterone. And within three days of a daily carrot salad, they had experienced the same hormonal change that taking an antibiotic did. (Add) any vinegar and basically any fairly saturated oil (like coconut oil).” Ray Peat

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Daniel Batten
Daniel Batten@DSBatten·
Take a look at these two insects. Pretty similar right? Both flying insects, both yellow and black. Both have stingers. But to a gardener they could not be more different. The image on the left is a honey-bee. They are critical to the pollination of many plants, especially those that produce nuts and fruits. In a world without the honey-bee we'd still have food because grains and other plant-based food is often wind/self pollinated. But we'd have less variety, growing food would be harder, and prices would be a lot more. The image on the right is a yellow-legged hornet. They stress your gardens: they chew bark, damage fruit and - most importantly - hunt other pollinators. A garden without them is a healthier garden. But the point is, if you don't know your insects, haven't researched how each impact the garden and have a "no flying insects" policy for your garden, your garden will grow more slowly, and garden by garden - you create a world where food is more expensive, less resilient and less bountiful. Lumping bees and hornets under "flying insects" is like lumping bitcoin mining operations and AI data centres under "data centres": technically accurate, useless for policy, and dangerous for the grid. Yet that is exactly what happened in Cedar Falls in Black Hawk County, Iowa yesterday. The city council voted unanimously to block a Bitcoin mining facility from its 60% wind-powered industrial park - an operation that would have monetised surplus energy, and balanced the intermittency of that wind energy, without competing with a single resident for electricity. The concerns? Power usage, losing control of the city and fear that these operations would consume more electricity than the city itself. Every single one of those concerns applies to AI data centres. None of them apply to Bitcoin mining. 🤦‍♂️ Source: kwwl.com/news/no-crypto… They sprayed the bee. Here is the nuance most people miss: the gardener who sprays pesticide on all flying insects does not get a pest-free garden. They get an unpollinated one The fruit costs more. The garden grows more slowly. The ecological balance is more fragile. A grid with flexible load has a shock absorber. When demand spikes, the miner steps aside in less than a second, freeing capacity without anyone building a new power plant. A grid without Bitcoin mining has no buffer, no surplus buyer and no way to balance supply and demand in real time without firing up gas-peaker plants that cost more and sit idle most of the year. The gardener who knows the difference has a healthier garden. The grid operator who knows the difference has a healthier grid. The word "data centre" is doing the same work as "flying insect." It collapses two fundamentally different things into one category so that people can avoid understanding the difference. The resilience of the grid suffers - and consumers get higher prices And this is worth understanding: it is human nature to fear what we do not fully understand If you cannot tell which insect pollinates and which one predates, the rational response is to keep both out. But rational is not the same as smart. Because playing it safe with a category you haven't bothered to research doesn't remove the risk. It just makes sure the risk is invisible until the garden, and those who rely on it, suffer.
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lordmicky.base.eth
lordmicky.base.eth@0xlordmicky·
Let me tell you about Michael Morton. He was just a regular guy, an American husband, a father to a five-year-old son, and an office worker. He lived in the suburbs of Austin, Texas. In August 1986, Michael came home to find police officers all over his house. His wife had been murdered, beaten with a baseball bat and covered with a pillow. The day before, they had celebrated their wedding anniversary. That morning, Michael had left for work at 5:30 a.m. and left a note saying he loved her but was disappointed that they hadn’t been intimate the night before. The police focused on Michael as their suspect. They said he killed his wife because she refused to have sex. He had never been in trouble with the law, not even a speeding ticket. Still, he was arrested, charged with murder, and sent to prison. He lost custody of his son, who was told that his father had killed his mother. Michael spent 25 years in prison. He was offered parole if he admitted guilt, but he refused, saying the only thing he had left was his innocence. There was important evidence, a bloodstained bandana found in an alley near the crime scene. Michael’s defense team asked for it to be tested, even offering to pay for it, but the district attorney refused. They had to fight in court to get permission. When the test was finally done, the blood on the bandana belonged to a different man, a recently released criminal. As they kept digging, they found even more shocking evidence. Other women in Austin had been murdered the same way after Michael was already in prison. Michael’s wife’s credit card had been used after her death, while Michael was locked up. Then, another hidden piece of evidence came to light. Michael’s mother-in-law had spoken with her grandson (Michael’s son) about the murder. She asked him who killed his mom, and the little boy said, “A monster.” When she asked if the monster was his father, the boy replied, “He’s not my father.” This statement was kept secret from Michael and his lawyers. Finally, DNA from another Austin murder was tested, and it matched the blood from the bandana. After 25 years, Michael was finally released. At a court hearing, the judge apologized for the terrible injustice he had suffered. The real killer was later charged with two murders. And what happened to the prosecutor who hid the evidence? He was promoted to a judge. Eventually, he lost his law license and was sentenced to jail, but only for ten days. Michael wrote a book about his experience called Getting Life (2014). Because of what happened to him, Texas changed its laws. On May 16, 2013, Governor Rick Perry signed the Michael Morton Law, which requires prosecutors to share all evidence in a case to prevent wrongful convictions like Michael’s. What a painful experience😭😭😭
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Dr. M.F. Khan
Dr. M.F. Khan@Dr_TheHistories·
In 1938, a farmer plowing his field in Akaki village near Nicosia, Cyprus 🇨🇾, hit something hard with his plow. It was a piece of ancient mosaic. The Cyprus Department of Antiquities came out, marked the location, and then left. They had other sites to prioritize. The mosaic stayed buried for 78 more years. In 2014, archaeologists returned to the site and discovered the remains of a large Roman cistern measuring 33 by 46 feet. In the summer of 2015, they found a section of mosaic on the south side of the cistern. By August 2016, they had fully uncovered the floor. It was a chariot racing scene from a Roman hippodrome, and it was spectacular. The mosaic measures 36 feet long and 13 feet wide. It dates to the first half of the 4th century AD. It depicts four quadrigae, chariots pulled by teams of four horses. Each chariot has a driver and four horses racing at full speed. The chariots are shown in different colors representing the four factions of professional racers in ancient Rome. The Blues, Greens, Reds, and Whites were rival teams that competed in the hippodrome, and fans of each faction were famously passionate about their favorites. Riots sometimes broke out between rival factions. Each chariot is accompanied by two inscriptions written in ancient Greek. One inscription gives the name of the charioteer, and the other gives the name of one of the horses. The names usually express some special characteristic about the driver or the horse. Some of the names identified include Kosmion, Protogenis, Pegaso, Polytalanto, Amphidromos, Bache, and Polyphemos. Standing between the chariots on the track are two men. One is holding a whip, and the other is holding a vessel of water. There is also a figure on horseback. These were likely officials or attendants associated with the race. The scene shows three cones topped with egg-shaped objects at the center of the track. These were lap counters. Three columns in the distance hold up dolphin figures with what appears to be water flowing from them. This matches descriptions of actual Roman hippodromes, where dolphins and eggs were used to count laps during races. The entire scene is bordered by intricate geometric designs. At the western end of the floor is another mosaic showing nine medallions arranged in a circle, each containing the bust of a female figure. These are the nine Muses, each identifiable by the symbols they hold. The hippodrome was extremely important in ancient Roman times. It was not just a place for sports competitions. It was where the emperor appeared before the people and projected his power. The races were massive public spectacles that drew enormous crowds. Chariot racing was the most popular sport in the Roman Empire. The hippodrome comes from the Greek words hippos, meaning horse, and dromos, meaning course. It was an open-air stadium used in ancient Greece, Rome, and Byzantine civilizations for chariot and horse races. This mosaic is the only one of its kind ever found in Cyprus. Out of the hundreds of ancient mosaic floors discovered around the world, only about seven depict chariot races at the hippodrome with this level of detail. Only two have been discovered in Greece, and seven have been found elsewhere in the Roman Empire, including North Africa, France, and Spain. Racing scenes like this are extremely rare in the eastern provinces of the Roman Empire. The discovery is particularly exciting because it was found inland, about 20 miles west of Nicosia, in a remote area far from the coast. The mosaic was likely part of the floor of a large villa belonging to a wealthy nobleman during Roman rule of Cyprus. Cyprus was an extremely prosperous island in antiquity. It produced copper, and according to one prominent theory, the island got its name from the Greek word for copper. Cyprus also produced timber from its forests and pottery, many examples of which have been found in neighboring countries. #drthehistories
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Shawn Gorham
Shawn Gorham@shawngorham·
I forget who said it but a post said "buying my 30 year old daughter with 3 kids a mini van has a bigger impact in her life than $300,000 when I am dead" (something like that) I have never stopped thinking about it and will use that as a compass as my kids get married, have kids, buy houses etc.
DOQ@doqholliday

If you're a boomer in your 60s and 70s and you own property and are well off but your children are struggling and can't even buy a home, what the hell are you doin? Your time is over. It's their time. Help them. Be a good parent, do whatever it is you need to do... sell the house if you need to, give them some kickbacks to help buy their first home, etc. Life is short. Be a good parent and don't squat on stuff that doesn't matter. Give them their time.

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Stephanie Winn, LMFT | ROGD Repair
Parents of teenagers, take note. This is never more true than when dealing with the ego fragility of adolescence. Knowing this can be empowering. In my course, I teach parents to pass messages through an altercasting filter before proceeding: how does this message implicitly frame my child? Does it frame them as naive and in need of correction? If so, it’s likely to be met with resistance. They’re rejecting the premise. There are ways around this. Different ways of saying the same message without wrapping it in an unpalatable layer of implied ignorance. Ways of positioning your child to actually want to ask for your opinion. I teach all this and more in ROGD Repair.
Anish Moonka@anishmoonka

When someone teaches you something you didn't ask to learn, your brain reacts like it's in physical pain. UCLA scientists watched it happen on brain scans in 2003. The same wiring that fires when you stub your toe also fires when someone treats you like you need fixing. Naomi Eisenberger and Matthew Lieberman ran the study and published it in Science. The brain region is the dorsal anterior cingulate cortex, which is just the fancy name for your main pain alarm. It doesn't care whether the threat is a hot stove or a friend telling you how to live. A neuroscientist named David Rock built a framework around this in 2008. Five things make the brain feel safe in social moments: status, certainty, autonomy, relatedness, and fairness. Take away any of those and the alarm fires. Rock wrote that one of the easiest ways to dent someone's status is to give them advice they didn't ask for. Even hinting that they're doing something wrong is enough. When people are told what to do, they often do the opposite, even when the advice was good. The psychologist Jack Brehm noticed this in 1966, and sixty years of follow-up have confirmed it. The brain is trying to keep your life feeling like your own. Close friends cut each other off with unsolicited advice in about 70% of supportive conversations, often before the friend has even finished explaining the problem. That number comes from a 2016 study by Bo Feng and Eran Magen in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. The closer the friendship, the worse it gets. And the advice tends to make them more stressed, more depressed, and more lonely, not less. Giving advice gives the giver a sense of power, even when nobody asked for it. Michael Schaerer and his co-authors, working across Harvard, Duke, INSEAD, USC, and Singapore Management, published this in 2018 after four experiments with about 700 people. People who chase power volunteer advice more often than others. Whether the student actually improves is a side effect, if it happens at all. So when you feel the urge to teach somebody who never asked, that urge is mostly about you. You walk away feeling a little more powerful. They walk away feeling like they were just told they can't run their own life. Most uninvited teaching is one person's ego dressed up as kindness.

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